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Ever since meeting my husband, deciding that I want to spend the rest of my life with him, and have a family with him, I have wanted nothing more than to be a homemaker. It seemed perfect because no outside-the-home jobs had never sounded all that appealing to me. The problem was, I still had 5 years left on my contract before I could realize my stay-at-home mom and homemaker dreams.
It took a while of struggling with discontent before it finally hit me. You don’t have to spend all day in your home to be a homemaker. I know this goes against the official definition of the word, but a homemaker is, in my opinion, simply someone who takes care of their home and the family inside of it. This can be done working 100 hours a week, buying your bread from the store, and serving the same soup every night for dinner (been there). Or it can be done, never leaving your house and cooking every single meal from scratch from the food that you grew in your garden.
I know there are many people out there who share a similar desire to be a homemaker, but due to previous comments or financial situations, it is not feasible. There are some simple things you can do to help you feel more like the person you want to be while still working full-time.
I recommend starting with one thing. Slowly work to implement the others as you feel they will best serve you and your family. You can’t start everything all at once. It is far too overwhelming and time-consuming. The way all of these things are possible to get done at once is by practicing them one at a time till brain power is no longer required to see the task through.
Hang Up Your Clothes To Dry
This probably sounds weird. But the thing that helped me to feel most like a homemaker is hanging up my laundry to dry. I think it has something to do with making me feel like I am doing things like my grandmother did. This can be done with a fold-out drying rack in a basement or apartment, or on a clothes line outside. If the rules of your HOA or lease permit, I think outside drying is the way to go. Especially in the summer, it helps the process go so much faster.
I find that hanging a full load takes about 5-10 minutes of time. I fold as I remove them, so no extra time is spent on that aspect. Plus, you will save a lot on electricity!
Make Food From Scratch
I want to start this one with a caveat. I don’t know if it is the side of the internet that I have discovered, but I feel like in the last few years there has been a boom in the popularity of from-scratch cooking. With that comes the feeling that you need to be making every ounce of food from the basic ingredients, and if you open a can or box of food, you are failing. This is not true. You are not failing as a homemaker or mother if dinner is a frozen pizza. I have seen so many disgruntled people who have a hard time accepting that their best is good enough.
With that said, I find that making a nice meal from scratch helps me feel more like a “proper” homemaker while I am still working outside the home. This does not have to be anything fancy. It can be something as simple as chicken that you threw in the crock pot before you left for work and rice that you popped on the stove when you got home, with a roasted vegetable. When time permits, you can do something fancier.
A little bit of forethought is sometimes needed when you are busier. This is true if you are busy at home or on the job. If you know you want to make tacos on Tuesday, you might need to make your tortillas over the weekend.
Homemade Products
Making your own cleaners is as simple as mixing equal parts water and vinegar. If you want to get crazy, you can add a few drops of essential oils.
As I have started making more things on my own, I have discovered that it often takes much more mental energy to make something for the first time than it does physical energy. It took me so long to start making my own lotion. The actual making part took about a minute and a half of effort.
Keep The Home In Order
I think we all relate to the feeling of frustration that comes from always feeling like you are cleaning, but there is always a mess. The discontent of always feeling like your home is a mess can be magnified when your time for cleaning is limited. Unfortunately, there is no magical solution to this problem. It is dependent on what your life looks like at the present moment.
If you are working long hours during the week, then you might just need to take an hour on the weekend and clean. If you have a few minutes at night, take a second to wipe down a bathroom.
At the moment, my current chore schedule looks something like this:
Monday- Groceries
Tuesday- Bathroom
Wednesday- Vacuume
Thursday- Miscellaneous
Friday- Bathroom
Saturday/Sunday-Laundry
I find that having it written down helps to keep me accountable. Knowing that each task will only take me a few minutes of time helps keep me from pushing everything till the weekend.
I hope that this post was encouraging to you that you can be a homemaker regardless of where you are in life. Please take heart and know that seasons change. Your capacity right now might look different from what you can do at a later stage of life. Give yourself grace, knowing that you are doing your best for your family and yourself.
Did you know I sell soap?
Check out my homemade tallow soap on Etsy!