My Fourth Trimester Symptoms and Survival

The first three months after having a baby, often referred to as the fourth trimester, were, in my opinion, the best and worst part of the whole pregnancy. It is so wonderful to finally have your sweet baby in your arms, making everything 10,000% worth it. However, you are physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted. Hormones are going crazy. Your body feels like it is falling apart. No sleep is being had.

With all things, I can only speak from my own experience, but these are the things I experienced, and how I dealt with them to make the first three months after my baby was born a little easier.

Exhaustion

The most common problem new parents experience is probably exhaustion. I think it is universal. My advice for you is simple. Sleep in any way you can. Ignore what the doctors tell you about sleeping. I would highly recommend doing your research into SIDS and the actual numbers on sleep-related deaths.

Due to reasons we will get into later, what I found most effective in the first two weeks was sleeping in a recliner. I would use my nursing pillow, and my baby would either lie across it or be propped up against my chest. After that, he slept on his side for a few weeks, and once we were confident in his neck control, we moved him to his stomach.

Something other than position that we found really helpful was making sure he is warm enough. It seems so obvious now, but we sleep under all these blankets to keep warm. If he is only in a basic sleeper, he is probably chilly. We started putting him in fleece sleepers with an undershirt and even covering him with a blanket.

Tailbone Pain

Part of why I couldn’t sleep in bed was that my tailbone hurt so badly for the first week after delivery. The recliner was great because the gap where the back and seat met lined up perfectly to minimize pressure. Aside from that, I tried not to sit for too long, and did a lot of pelvic tilts and spent time in child’s pose to stretch it out.

Ab Weakness

To say my core was weak feels like an understatement. It was gone. This was the biggest reason I didn’t sleep in bed. I couldn’t get up, especially not with a baby on me. As someone who pre-pregnancy had a pretty strong core, this was a big adjustment.

It took me almost three months to get my abs to close back up. Almost immediately, I started doing pelvic tilts and would engage and release my muscles to gently start helping restrengthen my core. It was embarrassing how much it felt like a real workout. After four weeks, I began to do diastasis recti healing and postpartum-specific ab workouts.

Falling Out

I have no means of fixing this one, and only include it to hopefully help you not experience the same thing. Five days post partum, I squatted down to pick something up, and I don’t know if it strained my stitches or what, but I felt like my vagina was falling out of my body for the next week. Take it as a word of caution, don’t squat.

Itching

A lot of itching took place in the weeks following delivery. My stitches itched as they healed. My stomach itched, and I even had bumps on the stretch marks. Moisturizing regularly helped to keep that under control. Worst of all, and the thing I told my husband will be what limits the number of children we have, was week five when I broke out in whole body hives.

I didn’t want anything touching my skin. Clothes, my other skin, furniture, water from the shower. None of it. I was trying to figure out how to sleep standing up like a star.

I tried so many things. I took cold oatmeal baths, which helped some, especially while in the water. Rubbing calamine lotion and breast milk on my skin helped some, too, but not enough for how long it took to apply. My favorite was to apply hydrocortisone, and then tallow lotion. Wear the least amount of clothing possible to help your skin air out as well. Be wary of things like Benadryl, as it could cause your milk to dry up.

Sore Muscles

The first few days after giving birth, my back and arm muscles were very sore. A friend of mine said it was her legs that hurt. I think it probably has to do with the positions you labor and deliver in. I stretched a lot and took nice, hot showers to alleviate my discomfort.

Emotions

I feel so bad for my husband having to deal with my emotions. The number of times I was crying and had no clue why is high. It took 6 weeks for me to not feel as if I could cry at the moment’s notice.

On a similar vein, I thought I was clear of postpartum anxiety, but it simply took two and a half months to show up. My biggest piece of advice is that if you notice the signs of anxiety creeping in is do not wait. I waited way too long the first time, and it got out of control. Especially if you want your (military) insurance to pay for your therapy. It will take an extra month to be seen.

Hip/Pelvic Pain

It is to be expected that your hips and pelvis hurt after giving birth. Mine felt like they needed to be shoved back into place, and having the chiropractor do so really helped. I also did some hip strengthening exercises and a lot of stretching.

Shaking

The Internet talks about shaking for the first few hours after birth. I shook off and on for the first week, primarily at night. I would have my husband carry the baby because I was scared I would drop him. If you have any tips to help with this, please share in a comment because I couldn’t come up with anything.

Temperature Regulation

Keeping my body temperature steady was very hard at first. Nursing would make me freeze, but I would quickly be sweating when done. I was constantly adding and removing layers and blankets.

Hunger/Thirst

For the first few weeks, I was hungrier and thirstier than during pregnancy. I wanted to eat only fruits and vegetables, and drink water. I quickly discovered the necessity of having a snack on hand during the nights, otherwise I would be starving. Lots of water was also a must. I purchased a second water bottle with a straw so I could easily drink and not have to refill at night.

Regardless of whether you are pregnant, postpartum, or my mother, I hope you found this post helpful. If you are still pregnant and looking for more advice, you can find all my experiences as a first-time mom here. If you are postpartum, congratulations, and hang in there. You will make it! I would love it if you would share your experiences and any helpful things you learn through your experience in a comment below.